Nobody’s Perfect—Especially Me

This week for the books and more blog hop, the topic is what we have learned about ourselves through our experiences of reading and/or writing.

Well… (blowing out a long breath), I feel I’ve always been fairly self-aware, and I can’t say writing or reading has taught me something new about myself (there’s still time though). I can say both reading and writing have confirmed several things that I already knew, and perhaps magnified them.

It may be easier to list them:

1. I like lists

Anyone who has worked with me will know I like a good old list to keep track of what I need to do. There’s nothing more satisfying to me than ticking off items when they’re complete.

I have a TBR (to be read) list for my reading, so I don’t forget a book that caught my eye, even if I can’t read it immediately. I’m not saying I follow this list rigidly by any means, but it’s there to look at now and then.

Writing is a pretty hectic profession, and I don’t think I could keep up with everything that needs doing from social media, marketing, blogging, and actually writing and editing, without a list. I would find it impossible, especially because I have another job to keep track of (by the way, I have a to-do list for that, too).

Photo by Suzy Hazelwood

2. I’m a planner

Yeah, I like lists, so it’s not surprising that I’m also a planner. Now, I’ve tried pantsing (writing with no kind of outline or pre-prepared structure for my book). The experience just ended up with me in a pile of crazy hysteria, not knowing what to do next. My characters went off on strange tangents, creating giant plot holes I still can’t seem to close. It’s not a pretty sight and then requires me to re-write huge sections.

The last book in my Men of Trade series is a prime example. I drafted it in November 2021, without a plan, and it’s still lingering with enormous gaps and unwritten sections that I need to get back to.

It is safer for my sanity to know, before drafting, what my characters’ arcs will be and what direction the plot will take to get them there.

3. I like to do things in order

Hmm… I feel a pattern is emerging. Yes, so I like to draft in order and start at chapter one, drafting the book chronologically. I don’t write the end first or skip bits—nope, not happening, I would go insane.

This is the same for my reading habits, I like to read book series in order. Do not loan me a book that’s number four in a series. At least tell me beforehand, so I can read the others first. Am I a bit of a freak? That’s a matter of opinion. I know I’m not alone.

4. Reality can take a hike

My choice of reading material may shock some, but I don’t care anymore. Give me a fantasy world of happily ever afters and you can keep your mysteries, your thrillers, your crime novels, your horror or harrowing true-life stories, and especially anything that includes abusing the vulnerable. I’ve read plenty of those in the past, but they’re just not for me anymore.

Reality is a mess. When I have a free moment, I want to escape, so give me something that will take me away from it all. Life is hard enough, and I want to know the books I’m reading will have a happy ending. The characters can have a terrible time on their way, but I like things to work out for them by the end. If this includes a hot alien, then all the better.

5. Nobody’s perfect

I’m a perfectionist. I don’t like it, but that’s the way it is. I knew this before I started writing but, damn, writing has magnified this terrible part of me.

I seem to be under the delusion that I can write the perfect draft and this really doesn’t help when trying to crank out the words. I overthink every choice, trying to come up with the best word or sentence structure, but I should just write whatever comes to mind and improve it later.

Then there’s the feedback. I’m getting better, but when I first received a critique, I made the rookie mistake of taking it personally. Nobody is perfect, and my writing certainly isn’t, but oh, it can stab like a knife sometimes when someone criticises it.

It’s taken time, but I now recognise that feedback is subjective. I want to be a better writer, and I’ve realised I must ignore that kick at my pride and accept that the reader is trying to help me.

Have you learned anything new about yourself from your reading or writing? Leave a comment and check out the posts by the other authors.

2 thoughts on “Nobody’s Perfect—Especially Me

  1. It’s not so much a “rookie” mistake to take the corrections on a first draft personally. It is drilled into us to be good and when someone points out a “mistake” that implies we weren’t good. It is something I fight with all the time.
    Happy list making

  2. Bianca, you and I both for each item on your list.
    I have a fridge list, a side fridge list, a purse list, a phone list, 3 computer lists. Reminders on the phone and text I text myself to remember… and you know what? *getting on a chair with my arm open wide, screaming in an omnipotent voice, “I REMEMBER EVERYTHING!!!!”

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